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  Time until 01-01-01:

Y2K Humor!

This section was supposed to be divided into parts, but I couldnt get enough stuff (suprised me too) So, here it is, first, the "In the Year 2000" predictions, and a Etch-A-Sketch and Y2K bit.

In the Year 2000

The human appendix will solidify its reputation for being useless, when it is caught behind the liver watching game shows and eating Pork Rines.

A drunken Billy Joel will burst into a bar and yell, ''Hey everyone, the Piano Man's here!'' He will be killed in a hail of beer nuts.

Pop Tarts(TM) will lose popularity when they no longer just pop out of the toaster, but leap out, shake their fists, and in a voice choked with emotion, remind you that they're alive, dangit, alive!

School attendance will soar as schools offer enormously popular courses in Chillin' and Gettin' Freaky.

In a move that will shock the culinary community, french fries and french toast will disavow all ties to France, and ask to simply be known as 'greasy potato slivers' and 'egg bread soggies.'

Sales of Johnson & Johnson baby shampoo will drop off dramatically when they change their slogan from No More Tears(TM) to No More Face(TM)!

The echo will no longer simply repeat what you say, but will make sarcastic comments about what you say.

Fat men will begin loitering in restrooms with the invention of the ice cream urinal cake.

Charmin is forced to produce a new ten-ply toilet paper after Taco Bell introduces its new 'Diarrheato Supreme.'

The Etch-A-Sketch and Y2K

Memo:To all employees
Subject:Increased productivity

Management has determined that there is no longer any need for network or software applications support.(See below)

The goal is to remove all computers from the desktop by December 31, 1999. Instead, everyone will be provided with an Etch-A-Sketch. There are many sound reasons for doing this:

1. No Y2K problems 2. No technical glitches keeping work from being done. 3. No more wasted time reading and writing emails. Frequently Asked Questions for Etch-A-Sketch Technical Support : Q: My Etch-A-Sketch has all of these funny little lines all over the screen.
A: Pick it up and shake it.

Q: How do I turn my Etch-A-Sketch off?
A: Pick it up and shake it.

Q: What's the shortcut for Undo?
A: Pick it up and shake it.

Q: How do I create a New Document window?
A: Pick it up and shake it.

Q: How do I set the background and foreground to the same color?
A: Pick it up and shake it.

Q: What is the proper procedure for rebooting my Etch-A-Sketch?
A: Pick it up and shake it.

Q: How do I delete a document on my Etch-A-Sketch?
A: Pick it up and shake it.

Q: How do I save my Etch-A-Sketch document?
A: Don't shake it.